Cersei's story didn't have to turn out this way. In the season's premiere, she boasts of being promised to a prince, which was Rhaegar, Daenerys' oldest brother and son of the Mad King. Tywin had hoped to join the Lannisters to the Targaryens, decades ago, but Dany's father, the Mad King, turned him down flat. Instead, Rhaegar was married to Oberyn's sister Ellia Martell, in a pretty conventional medieval-type marriage. Ellia turned out not to be Rhaegar's love, but instead of preferring Cersei. Rhaegar fell hard for Lyanna Stark, Ned's sister, leading to the revolt that killed the Mad King and most of Dany's family. Instead of marrying her prince, Cersei was married off to Robert Baratheon after he killed Rhaegar and was crowned king. And we all know how their marriage went.
Both the man Cersei planned on marrying, and the man she did were in love with Ned's sister; is that why she's hated the Starks from the beginning?
GOT, once again, has a first; a scene so shocking, the locals almost didn't allow it to be shot; it was filmed in a conservative Catholic country, where public nudity is a scandal. Maybe the fact that it was an atonement scene, with an adulteress being shamed by peasants, rotting food, spit, and whatever else was handy, made the local authorities okay it, anyway. The whole walk is certainly made as awful as it can be; septas roughly wash her, then give her what will one day be called a pixie cut. To be brought before the people of King's Landing in a dirty shift is bad enough. But the septas rip the shift off of her. And one septa will follow her the whole way, ringing a bell and yelling "Shame" all the long way home.
I'm sure this will go totally fine
At first, the crowd parts for Cersei and her dishonor guard. The Sparrows are there to keep people from beating Cersei, and they do their job as well as they can in a city that would love to tear Cersei apart. The first insult begins once Cersei is swallowed by the crowd. The crowds quickly escalate, pulling out every insult for a woman known to humanity. Peasants flash her, throw food, spit on her. Her bare feet bleed from the stone walks.
What's sad about this scene is that it's based on history; medeival France used this punishment. What's sad about this scene is that little has changed for women. It's easy to feel nothing for Cersei; but what about today's teen girls? One photo, taken even without her knowledge, can be posted and go viral, making her the butt of strangers' misogyny for weeks following. What about women flogged or murdered for adultery in countries like Saudi Arabia and Afghanistan? This scene is important for Cersei; it hardens her against the people of King's Landing as never before. But, this scene is important for us; who are you to judge other people's sex lives? And why do females bear the brunt of the public shaming?
Cersei's arrival home is greeted by Maester Pycelle, whose face makes it clear he's no longer her servant, and her Uncle Kevan, now acting as Regent. Cersei may be home, and may be able to beat the rest of the charges, but who will want her anywhere near the Small Council now? Tommen's absence confirms that her shaming has reduced her to powerlessness. Kevan doesn't say it, but he doesn't look happy to see that Cersei has turned the capital over to religious fanatics that could depose Tommen.
There's no word on whether Margaery or Loras made bail in the Westeros style; but Qyburn is at least there with a blanket and a new Kingsguard, which indicates that they've heard about Meryn Trant. The newest knight keeps his helmet on, since the little we can see indicates the guy has severe health problems. But he's a real gentleman, lifting Cersei off her ruined feet, and sworn to defeat all her enemies.
He's a fitting replacement for Meryn Trant, who Arya dispatches using one of the Faces. Meryn's taken completely by surprise, and covered in blood before he can even get a weapon. So, Arya decides to make sure Meryn knows that he's being cruelly murdered by a little girl, over a Braavosi water dancing instructor he probably doesn't remember.
Totally not used to his victims fighting back
Arya returns the Face, content that the first name on her list is finally dead; maybe she has plans for taking down the others, but Jaqen and the Waif confront her. She's broken the rules, and she's in big trouble. Arya is ready to maybe be grounded, or denied TV privileges for a week, but the Waif makes it plain that a vial of poison awaits. Instead, it's Jaqen who drinks it, collapsing while Arya screams for the only protector she currently has. Instead, it was another Game of Faces, with Jaqen appearing behind her in the Waif's place, and the new body turning out to have Arya's face. Remind you of a certain lightsaber duel in a cave on Dagobah?
As Arya panics, Jaqen informs her that using the Faces to break the rules is a great way to poison oneself, which Arya finds out for sure when her vision goes black, and we see her eyes fail. Will Arya be kicked out of the House of Black and White, blind to boot?
Tyrion ends the season well; he's left with Missandhei and Grey Worm to run Meereen and work on his High Valyrian. On Dany's terrace, he ponders how he's been left to govern a city he literally just arrived at in the name of a Queen facing outright revolt who's been flown who knows where, and that he's now caretaker to two very pissed off dragons. But it's all okay, because Varys shows up, and tells Tyrion that at least Meereen will be able to keep no secrets from him.
The Bromance continues
Tyrion watches Daario and Jorah, reunited but not really trusting each other, ride off to follow Drogon north, in search of Dany. Last week, we saw Dany fly away from danger, from death, from her troubles. Well, this week we see that Drogon has flown her into to even more danger and trouble. She makes it worse by wandering away from her only protector, so she can be surrounded by the first Dothraki khalasar that rides up. The shouts and riding in circles around a lone prisoner remind one of the cheesy and insulting Indian scenes in Westerns of the 1960s. We know that Daario and Jorah are good enough trackers to find the ring she leaves behind; will Drogon find her first?
Melisandre wakes to thawing icicles and puddles. She all but beams as she contemplates how Stannis' sacrifice and her god have come through, and she'd like a little recognition in Stannis tent. But, he's even more taciturn than usual. Stannis, more than ever is Richard III, both from history and Shakespeare's tragedy. He's accused his nephews of being illegitimate; he wants their throne for himself, and he's prepared to lose everything on one field of battle. Richard III, unlike Stannis, enjoyed the throne for a brief time; but he was a terrible ruler. Stannis would probably have been even worse; since he murdered his innocent daughter by fire, half his men snuck away during the night. Since no one raised an alarm, the guards were no doubt with the deserters.
Let's hope so; she's got dirty laundry and needs shampoo
Melisandre wakes to thawing icicles and puddles. She all but beams as she contemplates how Stannis' sacrifice and her god have come through, and she'd like a little recognition in Stannis tent. But, he's even more taciturn than usual. Stannis, more than ever is Richard III, both from history and Shakespeare's tragedy. He's accused his nephews of being illegitimate; he wants their throne for himself, and he's prepared to lose everything on one field of battle. Richard III, unlike Stannis, enjoyed the throne for a brief time; but he was a terrible ruler. Stannis would probably have been even worse; since he murdered his innocent daughter by fire, half his men snuck away during the night. Since no one raised an alarm, the guards were no doubt with the deserters.
I'm sure losing everything so you can fight one battle is a good idea
Another soldier has even worse to show him: Selyse's body. If Stannis is Richard III, Selyse is Lady Macbeth, consumed with the grief and guilt over where her ambitions for her husband led them. Like Cersei, I can't feel anything for her; she was Melisandre's biggest fan. She was stoic as she burned her own brother to death at the beginning of Season 4. And she betrays no emotion as her lifeless body hangs from a tree I don't know how she climbed in the dark and snow. Stannis certainly doesn't show much emotion; he's already lost his daughter for a lousy thaw. She's just one more loss.
Stannis also betrays no emotion as he finally reaches the field outside Winterfell, only to be met by the Boltons' much larger army, led by Ramsay. Ramsay's wolves make short work of the burning stags, and Stannis is left to wander alone in the woods until he's finally so exhausted he has to collapse. Where he's found by Brienne. Only one thing could get her to abandon her post, just as Sansa took her only chance to light a signal. The threat of getting caught in a battle plus the promise of justice for Renly??? It's too much, and Brienne snears a little at Stannis as she acts as judge, jury, and would-be executioner. Stannis has no regrets, but he's ready to go; he's lost and he's just content he went down with his sword in his hand. I'd love to think Stannis is dead; but modern TV has taught me one thing well: no one's dead until you see the fucking body prepared for burial.
That includes Reek and Sansa. Reek just might get the name Theon back after pulling a Darth Vader and throwing murderous Myranda down a shaft at Winterfell. She kind of had it coming, gleefully informing Sansa that Ramsay plans on mutilating her, saving her reproductive organs for last. Reek's been able to put up with whatever Ramsay wants to do; but Myranda's just the kennel-master's daughter, and Sansa's made it clear servants don't give the threats. We hear the awful crunch sound as she hits stone, but we don't see what Sansa and Reek will hit after they peer down over the outside wall, grasp hands, and jump together into the snow. Are we seeing the beginning of a great friendship? Will Brienne, already wandering in the woods Sansa and Reek will no doubt make for, find them?
Book note: Sansa is supposed to still be in the Vale, promised actually to Robyn Arryn's heir. Ramsay is married off to a Northern Girl who was Sansa's lady companion in King's Landing, and was willing to pass herself off as Arya Stark. The girl's real name is Jeyne Poole, and Ramsay was just as awful, if not more, to her. The show does get right that Reek helps Jeyne escape by jumping over Winterfell's outer wall to the snow below.
Other book note: the seige lasted much longer, as the snow trapped everyone gathered for Ramsay's wedding at Winterfell for weeks. The nobles left in the North fell to suspecting each other when a serial killer (not Ramsay, surprisingly) struck. Stannis was just stuck in the snow; the Boltons had a murder mystery and hostile nobles on their hands.
I swear, last book note: Shireen and Selyse end the novel at Castle Black, waiting for another Night's Watch castle to be made livable for them. Shireen is her usual kind self; but Selyse is bitchy about everything and everyone hates her.
Dorne ends well, there's even a raunchy joke about how Bronn just can't resist the bad girls. And when I say it ends well, I mean it ends with someone dying. Of course it would happen just after Myrcella and Jaime have a heart to heart about who her dad really is. I have to say, Myrcella takes confirmation of the whole incest/bastard thing much better than I thought; her whole claim to live in a palace and marry a prince rests on a lie. And what does she think of the body count over her family holding onto the Iron Throne for dear life? We probably won't know, as it becomes obvious that Ellaria risked her own life with Tyene's poison to kill little Myrcella. Will Trystane and Bronn figure it out, risking more violence between Lannisters and Martells? Did Bronn manage to scrounge any poison antidote before leaving Dorne? Does Prince Doran Martell know about this? Ever since the season premier, with the forest witch prophesying that Cersei's three children will die, we've wondered which kid will get it. How long will it take for Jaime to realize he sucks at protecting people?
Sam ends the season well, getting a free trip to Oldtown for himself and Gilly. The plan is for him to leave Gilly with his parents in Southeastern Westeros, near Oldtown. Oldtown is literally the oldest city of Westeros, built by hands now unknown. It's also the site of the Citadel, where Maesters are trained and chained. Sam plans on studying there, and coming back as Maester for Castle Black. And he admits to Jon that he may have broken a vow. About sexy time. Notice how, instead of marching Sam through Castle Black naked while ringing a bell, Jon just congratulates Sam on getting some nooky before Armageddon. I repeat that; instead of shamed, Sam is congratulated, even though he literally fucked a wildling. Heck, Lord Commander Snow even waves Sam and Gilly off.
And they get out just in time. Davos shows up, and not only does he want supplies, he wants what few wildlings Jon managed to bring back from Hardhome. Jon is in the process of refusing him when the only other survivor of Stannis' army rides in, to Jon's complete disappointment. Melisandre is back! (One wonders how Melisandre would have fared on the walk of atonement. Would she have scoffed at the judgement of infidels, condemning them to darkness as she passed by?) And for once, she's speechless. She can't even tell Davos that Stannis and Shireen are dead- he figures it out by her dreadful silence.
What will Davos and Melisandre do? Stay for the real fight with the dead? Stannis' bid for the throne is completely finished, which means Davos is guilty of treason. And he's already at The Wall, so why not take the black? The Wall will need him, and soon. Like, that very night soon.
Jon is left at night time with his very disappointing mail, and no one to complain about it with. Sam is gone; Ghost is somewhere, we haven't seen him for two episodes. Which, makes it the perfect time for Ollie to lead Jon right into his enemies' trap. Was Jon really fooled with Ollie's excited news? It seems he was, because the effigy he finally finds is the first blow. The rest are just cuts. In a scene that comes right out of Julius Caesar, Jon's brothers stab him one by one, declaring it's for their own survival as they give Jon wound after bloody guy wound. It's Ollie's betrayal that hurts most of all; Jon probably saw something of himself in the boy. But Ollie is as hardened and unrepentant as Alliser Thorne, and his blade finally finds the left side of Jon's chest.
The brothers remaining walk away, silently, leaving Jon in the snow. The last shot of the season is Jon's body, unblinking, motionless, and spilling dark red blood all around.
He looks dead. And Kit Harrington has stated Jon's dead. And the show's producers have stated "Dead's dead". Is everyone lying to cover up a last-second rescue? Martin, the books' author, is mum about Jon's fate entirely. Davos isn't going to be so blase about this death. And Melisandre is right there in the camp, and fully aware that her god can bring the dead back to life. Will Jon, with his last thought, enter the mind of Ghost, and spend his remaining days hunting and terrorizing his killers?
This finale, unlike others, creates more questions- 2 to 3 characters are very likely dead, but we don't know for sure. Reek and Sansa may find themselves trying to flee Winterfell with broken bones. Arya can't even see, for fuck's sake. Tyrion has hope for the future, and Cersei is even more committed to being a cunt than ever. So, go Lannisters?
Stannis also betrays no emotion as he finally reaches the field outside Winterfell, only to be met by the Boltons' much larger army, led by Ramsay. Ramsay's wolves make short work of the burning stags, and Stannis is left to wander alone in the woods until he's finally so exhausted he has to collapse. Where he's found by Brienne. Only one thing could get her to abandon her post, just as Sansa took her only chance to light a signal. The threat of getting caught in a battle plus the promise of justice for Renly??? It's too much, and Brienne snears a little at Stannis as she acts as judge, jury, and would-be executioner. Stannis has no regrets, but he's ready to go; he's lost and he's just content he went down with his sword in his hand. I'd love to think Stannis is dead; but modern TV has taught me one thing well: no one's dead until you see the fucking body prepared for burial.
Seriously, it's a flesh wound
That includes Reek and Sansa. Reek just might get the name Theon back after pulling a Darth Vader and throwing murderous Myranda down a shaft at Winterfell. She kind of had it coming, gleefully informing Sansa that Ramsay plans on mutilating her, saving her reproductive organs for last. Reek's been able to put up with whatever Ramsay wants to do; but Myranda's just the kennel-master's daughter, and Sansa's made it clear servants don't give the threats. We hear the awful crunch sound as she hits stone, but we don't see what Sansa and Reek will hit after they peer down over the outside wall, grasp hands, and jump together into the snow. Are we seeing the beginning of a great friendship? Will Brienne, already wandering in the woods Sansa and Reek will no doubt make for, find them?
It's Ramsay, we don't even have to debate it
Book note: Sansa is supposed to still be in the Vale, promised actually to Robyn Arryn's heir. Ramsay is married off to a Northern Girl who was Sansa's lady companion in King's Landing, and was willing to pass herself off as Arya Stark. The girl's real name is Jeyne Poole, and Ramsay was just as awful, if not more, to her. The show does get right that Reek helps Jeyne escape by jumping over Winterfell's outer wall to the snow below.
Other book note: the seige lasted much longer, as the snow trapped everyone gathered for Ramsay's wedding at Winterfell for weeks. The nobles left in the North fell to suspecting each other when a serial killer (not Ramsay, surprisingly) struck. Stannis was just stuck in the snow; the Boltons had a murder mystery and hostile nobles on their hands.
I swear, last book note: Shireen and Selyse end the novel at Castle Black, waiting for another Night's Watch castle to be made livable for them. Shireen is her usual kind self; but Selyse is bitchy about everything and everyone hates her.
Dorne ends well, there's even a raunchy joke about how Bronn just can't resist the bad girls. And when I say it ends well, I mean it ends with someone dying. Of course it would happen just after Myrcella and Jaime have a heart to heart about who her dad really is. I have to say, Myrcella takes confirmation of the whole incest/bastard thing much better than I thought; her whole claim to live in a palace and marry a prince rests on a lie. And what does she think of the body count over her family holding onto the Iron Throne for dear life? We probably won't know, as it becomes obvious that Ellaria risked her own life with Tyene's poison to kill little Myrcella. Will Trystane and Bronn figure it out, risking more violence between Lannisters and Martells? Did Bronn manage to scrounge any poison antidote before leaving Dorne? Does Prince Doran Martell know about this? Ever since the season premier, with the forest witch prophesying that Cersei's three children will die, we've wondered which kid will get it. How long will it take for Jaime to realize he sucks at protecting people?
Two down
Sam ends the season well, getting a free trip to Oldtown for himself and Gilly. The plan is for him to leave Gilly with his parents in Southeastern Westeros, near Oldtown. Oldtown is literally the oldest city of Westeros, built by hands now unknown. It's also the site of the Citadel, where Maesters are trained and chained. Sam plans on studying there, and coming back as Maester for Castle Black. And he admits to Jon that he may have broken a vow. About sexy time. Notice how, instead of marching Sam through Castle Black naked while ringing a bell, Jon just congratulates Sam on getting some nooky before Armageddon. I repeat that; instead of shamed, Sam is congratulated, even though he literally fucked a wildling. Heck, Lord Commander Snow even waves Sam and Gilly off.
And they get out just in time. Davos shows up, and not only does he want supplies, he wants what few wildlings Jon managed to bring back from Hardhome. Jon is in the process of refusing him when the only other survivor of Stannis' army rides in, to Jon's complete disappointment. Melisandre is back! (One wonders how Melisandre would have fared on the walk of atonement. Would she have scoffed at the judgement of infidels, condemning them to darkness as she passed by?) And for once, she's speechless. She can't even tell Davos that Stannis and Shireen are dead- he figures it out by her dreadful silence.
What will Davos and Melisandre do? Stay for the real fight with the dead? Stannis' bid for the throne is completely finished, which means Davos is guilty of treason. And he's already at The Wall, so why not take the black? The Wall will need him, and soon. Like, that very night soon.
Jon is left at night time with his very disappointing mail, and no one to complain about it with. Sam is gone; Ghost is somewhere, we haven't seen him for two episodes. Which, makes it the perfect time for Ollie to lead Jon right into his enemies' trap. Was Jon really fooled with Ollie's excited news? It seems he was, because the effigy he finally finds is the first blow. The rest are just cuts. In a scene that comes right out of Julius Caesar, Jon's brothers stab him one by one, declaring it's for their own survival as they give Jon wound after bloody guy wound. It's Ollie's betrayal that hurts most of all; Jon probably saw something of himself in the boy. But Ollie is as hardened and unrepentant as Alliser Thorne, and his blade finally finds the left side of Jon's chest.
Last thought in Jon's head?
He looks dead. And Kit Harrington has stated Jon's dead. And the show's producers have stated "Dead's dead". Is everyone lying to cover up a last-second rescue? Martin, the books' author, is mum about Jon's fate entirely. Davos isn't going to be so blase about this death. And Melisandre is right there in the camp, and fully aware that her god can bring the dead back to life. Will Jon, with his last thought, enter the mind of Ghost, and spend his remaining days hunting and terrorizing his killers?
This finale, unlike others, creates more questions- 2 to 3 characters are very likely dead, but we don't know for sure. Reek and Sansa may find themselves trying to flee Winterfell with broken bones. Arya can't even see, for fuck's sake. Tyrion has hope for the future, and Cersei is even more committed to being a cunt than ever. So, go Lannisters?
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