He Said, He Said - Walking Dead - Season 5, Episode 15

I realize that the show would be as dull as paint drying if we showed Alexandria for the 2-1/2 years of the zombie-pocalypse.  It would be dull mostly because the walls kept people safe, the supply teams provided food, and the place has a medical team that can treat most simple ailments.  Deanna's greatest guilt trip is exiling people who were a problem.  They don't have massacres and close calls in the woods because people run if there are too many zombies.  They haven't been attacked because they're a quiet people whose scouts don't seem to get noticed.  For instance: there's a serial zombie sicko out there, but the good people of Alexandria don't seem to need to worry about it.

I'm certainly not going to

Over the years, Team Rick/Carol has developed a Musketeers style; stay and fight so everyone gets away.  If people are sick with a fatal flu, kill them and burn the bodies immediately.  Don't lock future sick people in their cells, because that's mean, even if it means they will turn and get out after dying.  If there's a murder, beat the crap out of Rick to get him to investigate.   If there's another town nearby, raid them for your kidnapped people and hope that turns out for the best. If the prison falls, everyone just scatter into teams that will meet up somewhere no one knows anything about.  If a team member goes missing, suddenly follow a lead without telling anyone, even if it means being gone for days.  Go ahead, set the barn on fire.

The rhythm of the show is: Rick and Co. find a place to stay.  They figure out how to integrate some new members there.  Inevitably, someone fucks up and zombies come, forcing everyone to flee.  Hope they meet up again to try someplace else.  This has made for great television.  But is it a realistic survival strategy?  Can a TV show that's supposed to show people screwing up and banding together come what may in order to increase the drama really advise us on how to survive a zombie-pocalypse?  Rick and Co. showing up at your gate means it's only a matter of time before your town burns down.

Alexandria has been run by exact opposite principles.  And there are at least three times as many people in Alexandria, when Team Carol walked in, as Rick and Carol have been able to keep alive.  Alexandria may be a bunch of wimps with a book club, but they also built that wall, and jerry-rigged the solar panels to keep going.  And can eat. And get medical care.  They're so safe, the guns are stored in a locked room.  Team Carol showed up at their gate, with borrowed vehicles, their clothes, weapons and a baby, looking for shelter.  So, does Team Carol really know how to survive?  Or, do they only know how to fight?

Remember when the Governor slaughtered the National Guard Troops?  Do people see why he did that now? I wrote then, and I repeat, that it was tactically right.  Armed fighters who might or might not accept being led by someone else, and will need to be fed a lot to keep fighting was not on Woodbury's shopping list.  But, it was on Alexandria's.  Deanna thought it was a good idea to bring in muscle.  What she didn't realize is that the muscle doesn't see itself as her muscle.  Rick doesn't think he's Deanna's enforcer.  He thinks he's here to change Alexandria and how its problems are solved.  Deanna just wants someone who will keep the peace, not break up the delicate balances Alexandria rests on.

Is the delicate balance protecting wife-beating Peter fair?   Deanna and Rick agree that exile or execution are their only options, as wife beaters are notorious for violating restraining orders. Exiling him or executing him will deprive Alexandria of a doctor.  When doctors are rare.  It's not fair to Jessie, who must endure his beatings, or Sam, who's going to repeat his dad's behavior later in life.  But, does Alexandria get to demand that Jessie take a lot for the team, so Peter will go on saving lives?  Is Jessie's life worth the lives Peter's skills have saved?  Deanna says yes, especially since Jessie is unwilling to complain herself.

Deanna's had to trust that Team Carol knows more about running a town during a zombie-pocalypse.  Because Team Carol has shown, beyond any doubt, that they don't trust her.  Aiden's and Noah's deaths on the supply run has shown that her people and the newbies don't really work well together.  All she has left of her son is the crappy RunMix CD that none of them can bear listening to.  And that tuna casserole Carol leaves didn't do anything to console Deanna, or convince her the newbies have her town's best interests at heart.

Burning Rick in effigy

I like to think Deanna knows Nicholas is full of shit.  She pretty much tells him she's not believing him at the end of his debriefing.  She points out that Glenn brought him back, despite Nicholas' potential to get Glenn in trouble.  Why bring back a hostile witness?  With a newbie and a long-time resident both dead, it's hard to take a side if you weren't there.  It comes down to Glenn's word against Nicholas.  And, Deanna already publicly admitted Glenn knows what he's doing and Aiden didn't.  She can't just turn on him now.  So, she's done the only thing a fair-minded leader can do; suspend all visits outside the wall until she can determine who, exactly, is the idiot getting people killed.

Glenn, not exactly on Deanna's shit list but not getting chummy thanks from her anymore, tells Rick they've got to make Alexandrians their people.  Their best bet is to blend in with the long time residents, while also guiding them to better security and more successful supply runs.  Rick clearly doesn't think that's possible, even before he and Deanna spar about Peter's fate.  Rick is literally gunning for a coup.  Glenn's only deal breaker is if Nicholas ever goes outside the walls again.  With no authority to do so, he confronts Nicholas with we-both-know-what-happened-so-don't-lie-to-me.  It doesn't work.  Nicholas pushes back with you-ain't-the-boss-of-me.    Glenn returns with this-is-for-your-own-good.  It goes nowhere, as most pissing contests do.

I don't think it's a spoiler to point out that Nicholas sees the newbies taking over if he doesn't put a stop to it.  After all, why else would he go retrieve the gun he's been hiding that looks an awful lot like the one Rick lost?  Why else would the show paint him as an entitled boy-man who we will enjoy watching Rick kill?

Michonne is made late for work by a last-minute request from Rosita to look for Sasha.  Abraham relieved her in the guard tower outside the walls, but she never returned.  Horror Show Rule #1: Look for lost people, as that will lead to more trouble.  While their breath puffs in the air, indicating another fall is coming, they quickly find Sasha by following her head shots.  They'd love to lecture her against actively hunting the dead, as that's a really great way to run into a herd you can't get away from.  But they don't have to.  Because they run into a herd that Sasha couldn't take alone, but is just perfect for three armed badasses.  Michonne flashes back to her favorite beheadings before joining in.  Does she ache to take the katana down?  Or has she given it up cold turkey, like a drug?

Sasha will confess after the slaughter that hunting them is a great way to avoid her guilt complex.  Somehow, maybe through Abraham, she's learned of Noah's death.  One of the last things she told him was that his own lack of confidence was going to get him killed.  And, now he's dead.  Whenever humans suffer, zombies must pay.

Luckily, Michonne does make it to work just in time to be useful to the whole town.  She's probably a hero by now.  Rick certainly isn't.  Like an idiot, he decides to find Jessie alone to convince her to turn her husband in as an abuser.  A smart cop would have brought Deanna to show that the town would have her back, and provide a witness that no one coerced Jessie into doing anything.  Instead, Rick decides to use the power of sexy stubble and puppy dog eyes to convince Jessie that he's going to end Peter's abuse because he's totally in love.  Does Jessie like Rick even a fraction as much as Rick is infatuated with her?  Carol's already noticed, and Peter no doubt suspects.  Why hasn't Deanna?  She would have mentioned it when they bickered over Peter earlier.  Rick kissed Jessie in her house at a party.  No one saw?????

Of course, Rick's pitiful attempt to be Alexandria's hero ends badly.  The wife beater comes home early, of course.  The love interest decides she can be brave with the hero's help.  The hero and the wife beater circle each other, each making accusations.  It gets interesting when Rick and Peter hurl each other through the front window.  From there, Rick and Peter are now just willing to kill each other.  Blood flows freely down their faces.  They choke each other, they fight off anyone who tries to stop them.  The idea that Rick is enforcing anything that could be called the law has flown out the window.  Townspeople come to watch.  It's only when Rick sees Deanna, who demands they stop fighting instantly, that Rick's venom and anger finds a new target.

How dare you stop my epic fail!

Yep, Rick pulls a gun on his boss.  Rick has decided that being a bloody mess after brawling with the town doctor over whether he can live with Jessie anymore and after pulling a gun on the Mayor of Alexandria is a great time to tell everyone that they've been mis-managing their town, and don't know what they're doing.  Look, Rick, there's some things I'd change to.  But that's why we have meetings.  

Thank the Goddess Michonne has finally gotten to work, because she's the one who knocks Rick out. That Rick's trusted companion, who's practically Carl's stepmother is the one who knocks him out to end his ugly, accusatory tirade against a town that gave him shelter has the potential to permanently split Team Carol into camps.  Expect next episode to be about how you're either for Rick, or against him (and Carol).

It seems that the joining of newbies with Alexandria only works in pairs.  Carl and Enid have fun, treating the woods outside the wall as an amusement park, where the entertainment is not getting eaten by zombies.  Times when they're not threatened, are spent either running or using a tree to - ahem - "hide" from a passing herd.  It's the perfect opportunity to make out, because what's more of a turn on than dead bodies that want to eat you passing right by?  Amirite?  

Yeah, I'm right

Enid likes to act bored and over it all.  In reality, she only feels alive if there's some danger possible.  Once in the tree, instead of whispering to Carl that she likes likes him, she informs him that it's the zombies' world.  Carl and Enid just get their hollowed out tree in which to stare like frightened mice at each other.  Even their attempt to hold hands fails to teenaged fear of rejection.  Since these two aren't getting it on, it's a good chance to notice yet another zombie with a "W" etched into its dead forehead.

Aaron and Darryl, still out on the road, find no new recruits for Alexandria.  But they do find yet another "W"-marked zombie.  This one is dismembered, and parts are missing.  And Darryl insists it was done recently enough that they could find whoever it was.  Aaron looks totally unwilling to follow someone who wants to haul off zombie torsos, but they've only got two other choices:  run back to Alexandria knowing there's someone really sick in the woods, or keep looking for nice people in the woods when they know there's a sicko in the woods.  So, it's look for the sicko first it is!

And the W Sicko has been busy.  The next victim isn't a dismembered zombie.  The W Sicko has moved "up" to killing living people.  A pretty, blond, young woman has been stripped naked and tied to a tree.  Zombies did the rest, mostly to her gut.  Intestines dangle in front of her carved out belly.  Another "W" marks her forehead.  And, since this show doesn't show people actually turning enough, we get to see her eyes slowly open, now dead.  Darryl puts her down, declaring that this one was recent too.  Aaron looks resigned to hunting someone who will probably kill him instead.

Castrate the bastard, will ya?

For the last episode- is there a resolution to the power struggle we've seen building for three episodes?  Or are battle lines simply drawn?  Do Aaron and Darryl find the W Sicko?  Or does the W Sicko find them?  And will Carl and Enid realize that making out is so much more fun than hiding from zombies? 

One more pic of Rick as a total asshole.